I just had to comment. Raj said, and Vivek agreed, that:

“I never said that the rich men should encourage their wives to earn a living.I just said that if they are willing to pay money to get the cheerleaders to expose their flesh,they should apply the same standards to their wives and daughters and sisters,whether for money or not does not matter.I am just talking about the despicable double standards of men who want to keep their women “chaste” but encourage other women to objectify themselves.”

The whole problem with your statement is the phrase “their women”. Wives and daughters are not the property of the their husbands and fathers, and are free to wear whatever they want. The cheerleaders wear what their profession demands out of choice (as in, they chose to enter the profession), and the “rich men’s” wives and daughters will once again wear whatever they choose. It is not the “rich men’s” decision what the wives and daughters wear. The only thing the “rich men” can choose is what they themselves wear.

I just happened to read some of my comments on this post again today.I have understood what you wrote about cheerleading and prostitution and I think I have clarified my views on the same.

However,I do think that I have acted in a stupid manner by trying to compare the behaviour of lecherous men with women who are affectionate towards the babies and children of strangers.I don’t know why I even tried to make such a crude and shocking comparison.Ofcourse, I realise that I was trying to compare chalk and cheese.The world definitely can do without lecherous men but it would only be a better place if there are more women who are affectionate towards the children of others.

Also,I have written a stupid comment that the sexual desire of women is to have as many children as possible.I realise that it could sound very rude and very offensive to women in general and to mothers in particular.I apologise to you,Nita,and to other mothers and women who would have felt offended by those two stupid comments of mine.

Raj, you are being too hard on yourself. I knew you did not exactly mean what you said, and also sometimes one writes on impulse and regrets it later as it seems wrong. So don’t worry yourself over this, it can happen to anyone. Besides I know you are a person who respects women a lot. It is really very good of you to come to the post and write clarify what you actually meant. Thank you Raj. – Nita.

Snigdha, I can’t agree with Ravi but I know why he is saying it. I know Ravi for some time on this blog (over a year now) and well he has had some unpleasant experiences. I doubt whether he really means what he said. If it was a stranger who said that I would react even more strongly than you!

Captain Sharks, I agree that men who want to lech just need an excuse. What they are looking for (to tease and harrass) is a pretty girl/woman, not a half-clad one. If a woman is wearing scanty clothes they feel it gives justification for their sick behavior.

Raj, I agree that Indian women are very beautiful and we don’t need to get obsessed with weight like in the developed countries. Infact I think that women in dev countries are far more fatter than Indian women if one has to talk generally as the whole of India as compared to whole of America!

Thanks for understanding what I was trying to say.Indians(and others from the East) do not realise that Eastern culture is full of shameless double standards.

Indian women are worried about men staring at them if they wear skimpy clothes but will not hesitate to ruffle the hair of a child or pinch the cheek of a baby! At least the women can express themselves.Who will speak up for the child whose private space has been violated? Certainly not the parents of the child who only seem delighted that a stranger has pinched the chubby cheek of their baby.In the West,parents tend to view people with suspicion if they get too close to their babies or children.

That is the difference between Eastern culture and Western culture.In the East,people are happy if they get their rights,but the same persons will never hesitate to violate the rights of others.If someone questions those attitudes,people defend this stupid “culture” by saying that this is the “reality” of the East.As if one should not attempt to change the shocking “reality”.I see no hope for the East as long as we hang on to this stupid “culture”.Shame on Eastern culture! May Eastern culture(and its despicable double standards) perish!!!

Ravi,

I agree and disagree with you.Ofcourse,Indian men and women have double standards.Indian men are sexually repressed.So are the women.I wonder how many women in India have pre-marital sex.But it does not stop with that.The sexual tendency of many women is to have as many children as possible(I apologise to women for saying this,but it is a fact).So when they limit the size of their families,they show their “affection” on the children of other women.There is absolutely nothing wrong in that but women should realise that such behaviour also arises because they have supressed their sexual desire to have more children.

It is not just the men who are to blame.Women are equally responsible.I would even go one step further and say that women are more responsible.If mothers teach their sons to respect womanhood from a young age,there will be no problems.But they don’t do it because many Indian women hate womanhood.That is why they prefer to have sons.

I agree that Indian women make great mothers but it is only till their children reach adolescence.Once their children become teens,Indian mothers(and fathers,too) don’t know how to guide them.From an appropriate age,I could talk with my mother about sex in a matter-of-fact and scientific way.She never felt embarassed to talk about sex with me even though she was brought up in a totally different environment.Actually,it was I who felt a bit embarassed to talk with her about sex.But I wonder how many Indian mothers are comfortable talking about sex with their teenaged sons.I don’t think many would talk about sex even with their teenaged daughters! All this is because of the so-called “great Indian culture”.

I disagree with you about Kamasutra though because it is extremely unfair to women.It seems to treat women less as human beings and more as sexual objects to satisfy the desire of men.A real shame!

I strongly disagree with you about beautiful women.Every woman is beautiful in her own way and Indian women are as beautiful as any in the world! I think that most Indian women are very feminine and voluptuous which makes them extremely beautiful to my eyes!

Ofcourse,being so feminine also has its disadvantages because Indian women are not as fit as those in other countries.So what? As long as women are comfortable with their bodies,they are very beautiful! Being slim does not equate to being beautiful,man! I hate to hear that many Indian women have begun to starve themselves to become slim,affecting their own health in the process.Many Indian women also do not realise that excessive make-up and ornamentation does not make them beautiful.A beautiful woman is beautiful not because of her weight or make-up or ornamentation but because of her feminity,her attitude and her self-confidence!

well it had slipped into moderation and now its visible to everyone. – Nita.

Ravi,if indian men r virgin till 25,26…then obviously it wud be same with women too right,otherwise who r women sleeping with ? then how come all these molestations r only from one side ?all these r simply bullshit reasons,d main cause behind all these menace is d fucking mentality……indian women r not beautiful,as if these things happen only in india,moreover who said d men r something like god looking ??

Aha! Now I see where the misunderstanding regarding double-standards is coming from.
The men (fathers, brothers, whoever) I was referring to does not include hi-fliers like the Mallyas or the Khans. I was referring to the regular guys who turned up at the event to gawk at the girls: I’m sure not all of them passed lewd remarks and quite a few of them turned out at the stadiums hoping for some skin-show. I doubt they’d want their sisters or GFs or daughters to dress (DRESS) similarly. [I think the cheers and dancing were not the problem -- the clothes were.]

As for @Ravi:

Your rant about no-so-good-looking/fat/ugly/badly dressed Indian women — I don’t even know where to start! There’s an imbalance between ugly Indian women and hot Indian men with urges? Have the Indian men taken a good look at themselves in the mirror? What are you saying, brother?

I am tongue-tied by your comment but I hope there are Indian men who think differently ….
Or maybe I misread your comment (I certainly do hope so).

Nita, what say you?

I totally agree that we(indian men and women) have double standards.

Guys

Lets face the reality. We don’t have legalized access to pron, having sex before marriage is a sin, guy/girl remainin as virgins even if they r in their 30’s and most shocking thing is that their parents appreciate it. Who are we fooling? I think we are just fooling ourselves by quoting culture and tradition and living a life that is totally weird. There is nothin wrong if someone celibates on their wish but you can’t just force each and every kid to practice it against their wish.

we have a history in which sex education popped up in the form of kamasutra at a time no one else on earth didn’t even know cultivation. I bet there were no moral police at that time. I m really sorry for all the people who are sufferin in this way.

Basically indian women are not as beautiful as women in US/Europe/South america or even in asia. Even chinese women are considered hot as asian chicks. Indian women never got that recognition besides being dressed peculiar and wearing ornaments. But our women would never accept this. I m not doubtin the role indian women play as wife/mother and sister. They have already reached the heights of everest. Indian kids are blessed with good mothers. But we have few beautiful indian women whereas all indian men have same urges. I think its the imbalance thats provokin men do wrong things.So people who are WORRIED about the culture and shit please try to level this imbalance. If we have beautiful men and women in proportion then we wont have any problems or atleast make all the NOT-SO-GOOD-LOOKING people slim and beautiful. Im sure that will definitely work because recently an article in “science” said soon there will be only two races in this around the world 1. fat and ugly and 2. slim and beautiful. This topic comes under new evolution of mankind. Well It may not seem practical to most of you guys but it is what it is…..

I wonder do we have any urban/metros in india? Majority of people who claim themselves they are cool and livin a life of a mumbaikar whatever it is are not prepared and just not ready to accept really cool things like cheerleaders cheerin the public.